New Year's eve in Hyderabad, the whole city was transforming from it's usual lazy, mundane existence into a vibrant and colorful avatar. The city was gearing up for many a parties to let go of what had been and welcome the unknown. Everyone had their plans for the evening. Some were hanging out with friends till well past mid night. Some were planning a long drive to the country side in the hope of finding a pleasant lake side to spend the evening watching the stars and the night sky and some were heading to the most happening party in town, all set to let their hair down and let loose the wild inside them. Raj and Shipra were spending their evening by the lake side at Water Front a popular restaurant here.
The lighting in the restaurant was a dull yellow. Contrary to the mood of the evening observed Raj. The tables were laid out in a shape and form that made "2011" when viewed from the first floor. The music was romantic. A live band was playing some of the most popular romantic numbers from the house of Bollywood. It had become a custom for them, this annual end of year dinner at Waterfront. Raj was sitting by Shipra's side in a total mockery of all popular conventions of dinning. He liked it that way and she loved it too. It let him be close to her and she loved to feed him while they were eating.
Unconsciously Raj was humming to the tune that the band was playing. When he saw Shipra giving him a raised eyebrow and then a smile, he realized it was their favorite song that was playing in the background. He lost all self control in that moment of romance and blurted out to her in something that was between poetry and pure foolishly happy love -
When I first saw you
I was petrified
I was in love
I was horrified
It wasn't my cup of tea
But I still gulped it down
And I drew up the courage to tell you..
To love you is why I was born
Shipra burst out laughing. Her laughter to Raj was like a symphony of sorts. It made his day. It ruled his nights and it brought him immense happiness. Raj was a little bemused but he let it pass, he would give anything to see her smile or hear her laugh. It was his favorite moment of the day and there was a long list of days and moments like these in the short time he was with Shipra. He was drawn into the memories of that wonder full song that was still playing in the background. It was -
Do Dil Mil rahe hain
Magar chupke chupke
It was early 2005 when he had asked Shipra out for dinner at this very restaurant they were spending their new year's eve at. He had blocked the entire restaurant out for that day. He was a wiz kid IT dude with a fat paycheck that could afford almost anything. Shipra was a dancer. One of the most elegant and graceful dancers he had ever seen. She was a touch too wild for him but he liked that about her. He'd say to his friends, you need someone like her to pep up your life and add some rang to it. And so this had to be special. She'd laugh at his face if he simply went and said I love you with a bouquet of red roses. He'd gone out with her a few times before this and he'd noted this about her.
"You know! It was the best reaction I could get out of you for like ever. It was something. You did seem a little edgy when I sang those first two lines -
Do dil mil rahe hain
Magar Chupke Chupke
But your reaction went of the charts when the whole lot of them jumped in with -
Sabko ho rahi hai
Khabar chupke chupke
He saw a hint of smile on her face and he went on about that very special memory. "Your smile meant the world that day, and I had never seen you shy away like that. Ever!! I mean EVER!!" The smile on her face was slowly fading away. He was telling her, "You know how much you mean.." when he saw a very subtle change in her mood. Her face was hardening and she was biting her jaws. He asked what was bothering her.
And with no warning like the wave of Tsunami that hit the world not so long ago, she burst out with anguish that was so profound, it almost knocked the wind out of his lungs. "Stop with it alright! Can't you see I am upset. Can't you tell that I am not having a good time. Honestly! You know! You can't! You couldn't tell the difference when I got a haircut this morning. My feelings are the end of the fucking universe for you". The whole restaurant was staring at them by now. But Shipra did not care for the world. The whole time Raj was cherishing the beautiful memory of theirs, she had only one thing on her mind and that was, she had to make sacrifices, she had to let go things she loved to do and she just got an indifferent partner for life. A loving partner but indifferent nevertheless.
When she got her composure back, she was louder and her words pierced his heart like bullets shot at point blank range from an AK-47. "Don't you realize? This is not where I want to be Raj. I am a dancer. I don't want a dull dinner on New Year's eve. I want to go out and party Raj. That's what I want to do. I need some color. I don't want to sit here in this horrifyingly dull lighting of this restaurant and listen to some looser band playing romantic Hindi numbers. I am tired of this same freaking romantic dinner every new year's eve. Is it really so difficult for you to fathom you idiot. I thought you were cool. But you are just one self centered prick who will not cross his boundaries even if it made the love of his life happy."
Raj wanted to say, "But why didn't you tell me this before? Why now? Why like this?" But words wouldn't come out. He was devastated, too shocked to react to. He had a lump in his throat he could not swallow and the tears running down his cheek wouldn't let him speak.
Shipra pushed her chair back down onto the floor, stood up to her full height slammed the glass of wine in her hand down on the table and said, "You and me Raj. We're through! So long! Thanks for everything. And try to think beyond yourself for a change! Alright!" And she walked out the door and did not look back.
Raj sat frozen on his chair, glass of wine still in his hand, tears now streaming down his face and every eye in the restaurant staring at him, judging him. He got up but stumbled on the table and fell face first on the floor below. The dull romantic lighting of the restaurant suddenly seemed dark and stifling. He got back up on his feet and walked out the door. No one stopped him. "Out of pity", he thought to himself. A defeated smile spread across his face. All was lost.
It was new year's eve and his love had lost.
