Saturday, November 19, 2011

Meenakshi Saravanan - Desire over Love


Tears were running down her face. This feeling Meenakshi was having was overwhelming. The pleasures of infidelity and lust had taken over love, trust and faith. Hell!! It beat the institution of marriage black and blue and dragged it out in a procession as if it to humiliate it further. She had finally given into temptation. She had given into her curiosity of feeling another man. She wanted to feel one more time, what she had felt so many times now with Saravanan. She had rebelled against society and all convention that told her that she was to marry one man and spend the rest of her life dutifully by his side till death do them apart. She craved to feel the same way she had felt when Saravanan had first touched her, the first time he kissed her, the first time they made love. When that did not come, she found herself succumbing to the vices of the dark desires of her heart. Tears trickled down her face even as she was enjoying Ramesh's body move back and forth on top of her, sometimes moaning, sometimes grunting.

It was going to be just another day at the office for Meenkashi. Saravanan had dropped her off in the morning. The hug and the kiss he gave her when they were newly weds had been replaced by a cold "I'll cya in the evening honey!". A lot had changed over the past year and this was one of those things. She walked in with half a heart pondering over how quickly things had changed and how she wished they had remained the same. She was having a hard time in dealing with the harsh realities of life. It made her question all those hopeless romantics who said love happens once in a lifetime. Damn right it does!! She thumped her feet to the ground as the thought crossed her mind. "But does it stay forever?", she mumbled to herself.

Lost in this train of thought as she was about to pass through the narrow pedestrian entry gate, a man in all his haste brushed past her, his leg tripping over hers and his hands involuntarily holding hers in an attempt to stop himself from falling. Meenakshi let out a gasp as she found herself pulled by gravity and the weight of the that man. The course of events that followed rocked the very foundation of her life. As the young man got to his feet, apologizing franticly for what had happened, there was only one thing that was playing in her head like a broken record. She found it hard to pull away from that sheepish grin falling rapidly to the ground, the exhilarating feeling from the embrace of that man when she was lying face down on him, that familiar feeling that sent a shiver down her spine, the feeling when Saravanan had first touched her affectionately.

A few days later when they met again, numbers were exchanged. Conversations led to coffee breaks. Coffee breaks led to Ice Cream. Ice Cream to movies at Ramesh's apartment. Before she knew it she found herself in Ramesh's arms, longing to kiss him,  her lips locked with his with a passion and a desire she had not felt in a very long time. Before she knew it she was lying flat on her back with Ramesh on top. Before she knew it she had dropped her veil of morals and was moaning to the brilliant pleasures of lust. Tears were running down her face as she knew it was too late to bail out. She had dropped her guard, she was bowled over, she was knocked out.

Was it worth it? How would she bring herself to confront Saravanan? How would she look him in the eye, straight faced, concealing her dark secret? She did not know. All she knew now was that IT felt pretty darned good!!